As time for me to join the fleet comes closer I've began the thoughts every man has before he leaves; I need to prepare myself for the worst so as to not be distracted and thus remain combat effective. I feel that I'm ready to go do whatever it is the people of our nation (through the direction of elected politicians) need me to do to protect lives.
However, in these thoughts I came across the fact that if I pass I will be giving undeniable grief to those close to me, a burden that they have no choice over. It is my choice alone and doesn't seem fair that I should put that weight on their shoulders.
Ironically they are the reason why I put myself in harm's way. They are my motivation to be in situations in which I might pay the ultimate sacrifice. After coming to this realization I felt like I should say "I'm sorry" ha ha ha. It sounds odd but I don't know any other response to the situation. God gave me a gift, I am going to use it to protect anyone I can, physically or emotionally. Through might or words, I'll be in harm's way so they don't have to be.
1st Article of the code of conduct
"I am an American, fighting in the armed forces which guard my country and our way of life, I am prepared to give my life in their defense." And I'm sorry ha ha ha
~Josh
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Another day
A lot has happened since my last post. I've said it before but I'll say it again, I'm almost certain no one is reading my posts now, which works out pretty good because I've needed somewhere to put my ramblings recently.
Quick update on my life. I bought a dog in September-ish of 2009, his name is Apollo, he's a pure bread doberman and awesome. I'm very lucky to have him.
In January I went to my long anticipated SERE school (Survival Evasion Resistance and Escape). It was easily the most awful thing I have ever done in my life. I was sleep deprived, starved, beaten physically and worse..mentally. I was disoriented and hallucinating. During this I was interrogated and had the privilege/challenge of being the XO (executive office aka second in command) for all of the men and four women with me. I could go on for a while about it but I'll try to keep my update conscience.
I've been flying the F/A-18F since January. It's an amazing/extremely complex piece of machinery. The men I train with are some of the finest gentlemen I've ever had the privileged of meeting. Being around men of their caliber makes it easier to better myself.
The only down side is that I am far from my good friends (Kevin, Charlie, Grace, Chris, Zach, Sean, Stephen, Kelly, Melissa, Josh, Jared...list goes on forever) I miss them quite a bit but there is solace in that what I do makes it so they can sleep well at night.
I could ramble all night but I have an early flight tomorrow and need to go to sleep early tonight.
If you're reading this, you're name is probably on the list above. Know that I miss you and hope to see you soon.
Sleep well,
Josh aka Zoolander
Quick update on my life. I bought a dog in September-ish of 2009, his name is Apollo, he's a pure bread doberman and awesome. I'm very lucky to have him.
In January I went to my long anticipated SERE school (Survival Evasion Resistance and Escape). It was easily the most awful thing I have ever done in my life. I was sleep deprived, starved, beaten physically and worse..mentally. I was disoriented and hallucinating. During this I was interrogated and had the privilege/challenge of being the XO (executive office aka second in command) for all of the men and four women with me. I could go on for a while about it but I'll try to keep my update conscience.
I've been flying the F/A-18F since January. It's an amazing/extremely complex piece of machinery. The men I train with are some of the finest gentlemen I've ever had the privileged of meeting. Being around men of their caliber makes it easier to better myself.
The only down side is that I am far from my good friends (Kevin, Charlie, Grace, Chris, Zach, Sean, Stephen, Kelly, Melissa, Josh, Jared...list goes on forever) I miss them quite a bit but there is solace in that what I do makes it so they can sleep well at night.
I could ramble all night but I have an early flight tomorrow and need to go to sleep early tonight.
If you're reading this, you're name is probably on the list above. Know that I miss you and hope to see you soon.
Sleep well,
Josh aka Zoolander
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